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Fantasy » alt.fan.pratchett » [I] Boring, nothing to see
| [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5670] |
Mi, 30 März 2005 21:00 |
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Some boring stuff, don't bother to read, just me (Eriol, CKRone,
whatever) being pathetic.
I hate my job, been in it now for 3 1/2 years, first job since
graduating, and am so peed off with it. There is no enjoyment at all,
no fulfillment, nothing [1]. Oh, and a low wage.
Problem is I don't have the self confidence to believe that there is
anything better for me to do. Besides, it took me a year to get this
one, which proves how naff I appear to employers. It was even the first
interview, no other application got that far.
I doubt my degree will be any help as I can barely remember the
important bits [2], and any future employer would most likely just think
of how much a waste the university time was. And they would probably be
right, as I pretty much phased out in my final year because I wasn't
sure if I wanted to be there any more anyway.
I know, I'm pathetic aren't I.
Think, and get some help from here, about going to NZ, but after a few
weeks of research my drive just buggers off and hides somewhere, the
thought of looking for a new job whilst having a job seems pointless,
but the thought of quitting without any plans seems silly, even though I
keep thinking of doing just that. I just never get round to actually
handing my notice in, even when I have it in my pocket ready and
waiting.
Don't have a clue what I want to do even if I did quit, as I quite
honestly don't know what I would like to spend most of my days doing,
other than not much apart from reading, watching crap and going on the
net.
I don't even know why I'm posting this, as anyone reading it would
probably fall asleep through sheer boredom anyway.
What is the point of existing if you have no place to go? No route to
get there?
*sigh*
30 today [3] , live with parents, no life, very few, if any friends, no
hope, no future. What is the point? Why even continue?
*sigh*
Rambling pointlessness over.
--
CKRone (I know, it would help if I kept the same nick as well, Eriol)
ku.gro.nesnub [at] enorkc Ooh look, reverse me.
How do you change the unchangable?
[1] NHS, mini supervisor, forecasting waiting times. Oh the joy.
[2] Computer Science, I can't code or anything like that to save my
life...
[3] Happy birthday to me, wish people would ignore it, not worth
celebrating anyway.
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5676 ] |
Mi, 30 März 2005 22:09 |
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Blimey mate - you sound as if you would have to look up with a telescope to
see the underside of a passing slug!
Biggest obstacle is the one you've put your finger on - depression. If you
really feel like this all the time then the first thing you ought to do is
see a properly trained counsellor. Otherwise, if you do get more positive
periods then cut loose and book that trip to NZ - commit yourself. As I
think several people said a while back, it will change your life and your
self-image.
Good luck.
Rgemini, who shall remain sigless
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5678 ] |
Mi, 30 März 2005 22:49 |
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In article <eKudnY3v-KT8mtbfRVnyjw [at] pipex.net>,=20
roy.OMIT.ayres.OMIT [at] dsl.OMIT.pipex.com says...
> Blimey mate - you sound as if you would have to look up with a telescope =
to=20
> see the underside of a passing slug!
>=20
> Biggest obstacle is the one you've put your finger on - depression. If yo=
u=20
> really feel like this all the time then the first thing you ought to do i=
s=20
> see a properly trained counsellor.=20
Or a doctor - anti-depressants are sometimes (but not always) the right=20
solution. They work for me. Which is not to knock counsellors, who can=20
also be the right solution - my wife is one.
--=20
[at] lec =A9awley
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5684 ] |
Mi, 30 März 2005 23:58 |
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CKRone wrote:
[Warning: usual disclaimers apply. I have no qualifications to talk
about this stuff, only the experience of one job that I quit before I
was thrown out, loads of unsuccessful interviews, and the societal
equivalent of Granny's "Sukrose and Akwa"]
> Some boring stuff, don't bother to read, just me (Eriol, CKRone,
> whatever) being pathetic.
You don't write a message that long if you don't _really_ want people
to read it.
> I hate my job, been in it now for 3 1/2 years, first job since
> graduating, and am so peed off with it. There is no enjoyment at all,
> no fulfillment, nothing [1]. Oh, and a low wage.
You paint a picture of a very unhappy bunny. Without enjoyment or
fulfilment, the low wage is the least of your worries - as long as you
can keep a roof over your head and food on your table. Trust me - I
went from a well(ish) paid job that I hated to a much lower salary but
doing a job that I enjoy, and it is great!
> Problem is I don't have the self confidence to believe that there is
> anything better for me to do. Besides, it took me a year to get this
> one, which proves how naff I appear to employers. It was even the first
> interview, no other application got that far.
Er, hold on a moment. You got a job at your _first_ interview?
I repeat - you got a job at your *FIRST* interview? And you think you
appear crap to employers?
Whoa!
With a bit of help, training and practice, _anyone_ can write a good
CV. Anyone can sell themselves on paper, even if they are no use at
all (which is definitely not your case) - you just need to write some
more, get some more advice, write some more, get some more advice,
repeat til its good. You don't even have to apply for any jobs here,
just practice writing CVs. Tweak it, amend it, change it, re-word it,
re-style it - you have all the time in the world to get it right.
I have the opposite problem. I get a fair few interviews - not for
everything I apply for, but a healthy proportion. And then they decide
not to give me the job. Interview technique is _much_ harder to
improve, but yours must be reasonably good - congratulations, you've
already passed the more difficult of the two!
> I doubt my degree will be any help as I can barely remember the
> important bits [2], and any future employer would most likely just
> think of how much a waste the university time was.
Unless you are going into a very specialised or techie environment,
its unlikely that any interviewer will be picking over the minutiae of
your degree course - they will be far more interest that you have a
degree (ie, have proven some level of intelligence and capacity to
work), and in how you put yourself across.
> And they would probably be right, as I pretty much phased out in my
> final year because I wasn't sure if I wanted to be there any more
> anyway.
So don't tell them that.
> I know, I'm pathetic aren't I.
Not at all. Most people I know don't know what they want to do or how
to do it; even those that are in jobs that they _do_ enjoy.
> the thought of looking for a new job whilst having a job seems
> pointless, but the thought of quitting without any plans seems silly,
> even though I keep thinking of doing just that.
If you aren't really sure what to do, how about going to an agency?
You might end up doing short-term temp work for a while, but at least
it will show you a variety of jobs and employers, which will put you
in better stead for looking for something long-term, and will reduce
the pressure to find and accept a job quickly if you aren't sure that
it's the right one for you.
> I don't even know why I'm posting this, as anyone reading it would
> probably fall asleep through sheer boredom anyway.
Yeah, well. I'm not easily bored. And AFP has helped me through
traumatic times in the past, so it's only fair to pay it forward to
the next poor sod.
> 30 today [3] , live with parents, no life, very few, if any friends,
> no hope, no future. What is the point? Why even continue?
So you can prove the nay-saying bastards wrong. In a better job, you
will feel a different person in no time. You will make friends, you
will make money, you will get a life, you will find a way to set up
home on your own or sharing with friends. Life will get better. That's
why.
--
Stevie D
\\\\\ ///// Bringing dating agencies to the
\\\\\\\__X__/////// common hedgehog since 2001 - "HedgeHugs"
___\\\\\\\'/ \'///////_____________________________________________
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5686 ] |
Mi, 30 März 2005 23:57 |
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Blimey - I had to look twice, I thought it was me who wrote that post. I'm
30 in 2 weeks and pretty much in exactly the same situation as yours, though
I would have added "can't get a woman" to the list at the end.
Wayne Farmer
"CKRone" <seeker_2001 [at] yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:amtl41l39estnf91ob3dlq2uabljfs74of [at] 4ax.com...
> Some boring stuff, don't bother to read, just me (Eriol, CKRone,
> whatever) being pathetic.
>
> I hate my job, been in it now for 3 1/2 years, first job since
> graduating, and am so peed off with it. There is no enjoyment at all,
> no fulfillment, nothing [1]. Oh, and a low wage.
>
> Problem is I don't have the self confidence to believe that there is
> anything better for me to do. Besides, it took me a year to get this
> one, which proves how naff I appear to employers. It was even the first
> interview, no other application got that far.
>
> I doubt my degree will be any help as I can barely remember the
> important bits [2], and any future employer would most likely just think
> of how much a waste the university time was. And they would probably be
> right, as I pretty much phased out in my final year because I wasn't
> sure if I wanted to be there any more anyway.
>
> I know, I'm pathetic aren't I.
>
> Think, and get some help from here, about going to NZ, but after a few
> weeks of research my drive just buggers off and hides somewhere, the
> thought of looking for a new job whilst having a job seems pointless,
> but the thought of quitting without any plans seems silly, even though I
> keep thinking of doing just that. I just never get round to actually
> handing my notice in, even when I have it in my pocket ready and
> waiting.
>
> Don't have a clue what I want to do even if I did quit, as I quite
> honestly don't know what I would like to spend most of my days doing,
> other than not much apart from reading, watching crap and going on the
> net.
>
> I don't even know why I'm posting this, as anyone reading it would
> probably fall asleep through sheer boredom anyway.
>
> What is the point of existing if you have no place to go? No route to
> get there?
>
> *sigh*
>
> 30 today [3] , live with parents, no life, very few, if any friends, no
> hope, no future. What is the point? Why even continue?
>
> *sigh*
>
> Rambling pointlessness over.
> --
> CKRone (I know, it would help if I kept the same nick as well, Eriol)
> ku.gro.nesnub [at] enorkc Ooh look, reverse me.
> How do you change the unchangable?
>
> [1] NHS, mini supervisor, forecasting waiting times. Oh the joy.
> [2] Computer Science, I can't code or anything like that to save my
> life...
> [3] Happy birthday to me, wish people would ignore it, not worth
> celebrating anyway.
>
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5687 ] |
Do, 31 März 2005 00:01 |
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Roy Ayres wrote:
> Blimey mate - you sound as if you would have to look up with a
> telescope to see the underside of a passing slug!
>
> Biggest obstacle is the one you've put your finger on - depression.
> If you really feel like this all the time then the first thing you
> ought to do is see a properly trained counsellor. Otherwise, if you
> do get more positive periods then cut loose and book that trip to NZ
> - commit yourself. As I think several people said a while back, it
> will change your life and your self-image.
>
I agree with Roy. I know there are some times when life can get you down,
but take it from a perpetual optimist: things are not that bad. I don't know
if you always feel like this, or you simply are having a bad day (been
there; I'm a student). But if it is the former, then you really need to find
a solution. Maybe councilling, maybe anti-depressants, maybe just a nice
glass of cocoa (half full ofcourse) and a really good book every now and
again (may I recomend Terry Pratchett? Everyone else will). But find a way
to enjoy life for its good points, and it will make the bad parts much
easier to change, or at least live with.
--
Puck (onstage): I am that merry wanderer of the night!
Peaseblossom (in audience): I am that merry wanderer of the night,
indeed! "I am that
giggling-dangerous-totally-bloody-psychotic-menace-to-life and limb,
more like." -Neil Gaiman
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5701 ] |
Do, 31 März 2005 00:52 |
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"CKRone" <seeker_2001 [at] yahoo.com> wrote:
> Some boring stuff, don't bother to read, just me (Eriol, CKRone,
> whatever) being pathetic.
Started to strike a few chords, so I kept reading... Won't go into
details but...
>
> I hate my job, been in it now for 3 1/2 years, first job since
> graduating, and am so peed off with it. There is no enjoyment at all,
> no fulfillment, nothing [1]. Oh, and a low wage.
Over seven years, here. The first four or five were Ok, but the job
'morphed' into one with no enjoyment (possibly Peter Principle applies,
except without the promotion aspect) and was my first full-term job.
I'm in an employment-inertia trap, like yourself, though.
Won't go into most of the rest (some personal stuff, I admire your
spilling the beans but I'm repressing it...) but I'm no more than a year
older, no degree, I do live away from parents, but still have ties to
the apron strings and the magical 'social life' hasn't loomed on the
horizon yet.
> 30 today [3] , live with parents, no life, very few, if any friends,
no
> hope, no future. What is the point? Why even continue?
>
> *sigh*
I'm not saying I'm in a worse situation (though I definitely could do
better, and there's some self-inflicted stuff I won't bore you with) and
I probably wouldn't want to swap with you, either, but I think I can
relate. I'm unsure what to do about my situation (a millon ideas, and
uncertain what to do with any of them) but I'm planning on muddling
through until some point where the satalemate gets broken and then (hope
to) not look back...
It's a waiting game, and perhaps I should be making it a chasing game.
That's for more motivational people than myself to suggest to both of
us, however... :)
> Rambling pointlessness over.
Here's my rambling pointlessness, and in the best traditions of
pointlessness it has nothing to do with the above. I've cheered myself
up (albeit by wasting some time, but it'd probably have been wasted
anyway) with a phone call.
Phone rings. Phone does it's funny thing of sounding a short while even
after picking up. This is a fault with the phone (cordless), but any
regular contactees have heard it enough times to get used to it. Not a
regular, however, as a hesitant but deep indian (subcontinent) accent
introduces himself to me with an English name I doubt he was christened
with (or whatever formalities they use to associate babies and names in
Delhi), suggests he has a cellphone (hah! We call them 'mobile phones'
in the UK!) that might interest me. Later on he claims to be T-Mobile,
but I'm sure that's not the company he first pretends to be. Spends two
minutes very slowly telling me that the line rental will be $amount for
six months and $amount2 from there until the end of the 18 month
contract, which ends up: a) slightly more per month (on average) than
I'm paying now for a phone I don't think I even need, b) an 18 month
lock-in. Not the best deal I've had. Last night I got called by
another lot who offered a phone that has a similar stepped payment
scheme, but also gives cashback at the end of the four quarters to the
value I'd be paying in line rental. Net cost, zero (plus lost interest,
plus calls, though that'd be zero if I make as few calls as I do now, as
it'd easily fit into even the stingiest 'free minutes' package).
Then launches (without warning) into asking if they have my phone number
correct and address correct (he does, which is surprising, most of them
have a house number that's off by six...) asks for job title and marital
status. At that point, because I'm not just "uhuh"ing information he
already has, I start to ask if he's there to sell me a phone or do a
survey. I thought that might scare him off, but it didn't, so I get to
keep on talking to him. Ask more about the phone. The question that
/really/ stunmps them (I find) is asking what the resolution of the
camera and/or screen is.
Sometimes when I ask that question, I have to /describe/ what
'resolution' means... "So many pixels by so many pixels, which you can
multiply together to get a number of megapixels or just tell me the two
numbers and I'll work it out". On one occasion, the caller kept on
giving me the numbers of "em em" (milimeters) of the length, width and
bredth... ("No, that's the size of the phone...") On this occasion it
only keeps him stumped for a couple of minutes. He tells me hell pass
me on to his supervisor. (I've had them give me a URL before and ring
back, you know. I tend to save their time on the second call.)
Anyway, the supervisor turns out to be a woman which (without being
sexist, either, just reporting the situation) is is a first for me when
talking to such a call centre. She has her own English name, but I
still didn't believe it. We actually spend some time (no, she spends
some time) repeating the 'great deal' information that I already have
and though I think I get a little bit further (I get the resoluton of
the screen), after a couple of "Please hold on"s (presumably while she
goes and talks to someone) she passes me onto the Supreme Supervisor.
(The word was not really 'Supreme', but I frorget now, in the ists of
time, what it was. It was essentially the same thing.) I don't think I
ever got his name, but on with the tale.
Twenty (two-oh, 20) minutes have now passed since the call came in (at
approximately 21:50 BST) and I've put the video on to record something
starting at 10 during that time (either during the gaps or while
talking... at least I no longer tend to just lie on the floor next to
the table with the phone on it, now I'm using cordless handsets) and a
got refreshments. But still, I'm near the end straights, right?
I get more details of the phone from the <something> Supervisor. It's
puncuated by pauses, probably while he has to deal with slightly
less-troublesome people than me (I know by this point I do /not/ want
the phone, I could wait a couple of days and get another call from the
people who are offering one at zero net cost), but he seems eager to
complete the transaction that never even officially started. I give him
the opportunity to bow out, saying "I'm not even looking for a phone,
but as you called me I thought I might find out what you were offering,"
and similar. He persists. We find out there are three camera modes,
and some time after (but not immediately, and after some more "please
hold"s from him, we find out that it depends on whether it's the regular
picture (portrait), landscape (which is lower res because it's a cropped
portrait) or night-shot (lower res because... interpolation for
extra-sensitivity, perhaps?). There's a 4x digital zoom on this. Or is
it on the other one? He decides that instead of the Nokia model maybe
I'd like the Motarola one, and I may be mixing up some of the specsand
descriptions. He says that he Motarola is "much more advanced", and
then singularly fails to prove that it is. It's quad-band (instead of
the tri-band of the previous one) and has Bluetooth, but there's not
much mroe difference. The camera takes pictures that are around
0.16MPixel, which is poor compared with some models I know exist with
1MPixel abilities. (Which is poor compared to a digital camera, as I
always tell those who ring. Never seems to put them off, though.)
Apparently I get Push-To-Talk with the Motorola. Or maybe I do, it's
something I've heard of that's well known in the US but not so much here
(or India, it seems) and I tend to ask the salespeople about it and
occasionally (like this time) I get a hesitant "erm... yes" that doesn't
convince me that they do. They usually (like this time) explain that
the full details come with the phone, but I never get that far.
One of my key phrases (like "You've yet to convince me I need this
phone", which I use without shame regularly) must trigger something,
because he asks me bluntly if I think I want the phone. I say that he
hasn't really given me any reason to go for the phone, repeat that they
called me, not I them and things like that. He hangs up on me.
Fifty minutes.
I was on the phone for fifty minutes.
I only spent ten minutes writing the above, albeit that there were one
or two "hold on"s interspersed in the final half hour.
I despair of the human race, sometimes, but the above at least left me
(perhaps wrongfully) feeling superior. I've got rid of them within a
minute, before now, even without putting the receiver down at my end,
but for stress relief (with the side-effect of bad karma, probably) you
can't beat talking to a call centre.
On the other hand, the other week, we had a power cut. I fished out an
old phone that was not (like the cordless system I described above)
powered by mains and would work straight from the socket. I called the
appropriate people to say "there appears to be a power cut in my area"
and /two/ minutes after putting the phone down I got someone trying to
sell me something. I brushed them off like <TO MAKE A SNAPPING SOUND
WITH THE FINGERS>. When the power returned to me (after a couple of
hours, with my neighbours [the next semi-detached house over] having no
power until then yet the neighbours neighbours [sharing a common wall]
having had it back within 3/4 hour), within two minutes I got a call
from people trying to sell me life insurance. (And remember, this phone
was working all the time from when I plugged it in, not reliant on
power.) I brushed them off as well. Besides which, they've called me
several times before (over several years) and they've never convinced me
that I'm not covered already for things they want to cover me for.
Look, I know some of you AFPers work in call-centres (or have done), and
when I called around for my car insurance, last time, I had the good
fortune to get the lowest quote from the most local call centre
(actually, it was proper office, about 10 miles down the road) and
could take up their offer. "Local call centres for local people" I
don't mind, and wish you all the best finding a job that you like
without wishing ill of you, but while II hope don't have any inbuilt
racist tendencies, the factory-farmed international cold-calling call
centre people that call me from India (though there are chances that
British-resident people of Indian extraction have called me locally, and
I have nothing against them and feel ashamed for any times my
assumptions have been unfounded) trying to sell me a phone most nights
(sometimes several times a day, at weekends) tend not to inspire me with
feelings of sibling joy for such fellow members of the human race
sitting at the other end of the line. You'd think they'd get the
message. I'm /not/ registered to the Telephone Preference Service, but
I know (from friends' experiences) that'll only stop the ones that have
scruples and don't call from abroad, anyway, so maybe I could do more,
but I like to feel that their calls from oversees (even with a bulk
discount, or tunnelling over a dedicated line to a local point on the
network) are probably worth increasing in cost.
And then I also get a lot of "Congratulations, you've won a holiday!"
recorded messages, some of them devious, some of them charming, some of
them with 090x numbers, one (once) wanted be to dial "33 0800
somethingelse", which (as far as I was bothered to find out, without
trying) didn't even sound like it would work, but I could be wrong and
could have been an "expensive hiding as freephone" scam. I had one from
Disney that just kept repeating ("press 1 now, or call 0800 ...") and I
admit I let it keep repeating over and over and over until (half an hour
later) the phone complained it was off the hook with no active call.
That was more malicious than usual, but it felt good at the time. ;)
(I've also tried to track down a UK number to report these things to,
e.g. to OfTel or OfCom, or whatever they are now, but the closest I ever
got was the "Nuisance and Abusive Calls" line operated by BT, and while
I was waiting and waiting and waiting for someone to pick up I decided
it wasn't quite the right place to go and eventually hung up...)
There you go. My rambling. I even eschewed the use of footnotes
(though should have attempted to use them, in hindsight). Has the added
benefit of making me forget how unexceptional my life is as well. At
least until I mention it in my closing paragraph... ;)
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5705 ] |
Do, 31 März 2005 01:17 |
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"Wayne Farmer" <news [at] removeifnotspamyavin-4.demon.co.uk> wrote:
> Blimey - I had to look twice, I thought it was me who wrote that post.
I'm
> 30 in 2 weeks and pretty much in exactly the same situation as yours,
though
> I would have added "can't get a woman" to the list at the end.
I've more or less decided that I'm not much of a catch at the moment,
that I've got to resolve other issues of mine, so I'm pleased(?) to say
that that particular failing is not an immediate concern of mine at the
moment...
(Which smiley to use... Which smiley... Not :) Not :( Not ;) Not XD
Must be <sef> that I'm trying to say, eh..?)
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5712 ] |
Do, 31 März 2005 03:46 |
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Stevie D <stevieinyork [at] yahoo.co.uk> wrote:
> > Problem is I don't have the self confidence to believe that there is
> > anything better for me to do. Besides, it took me a year to get this
> > one, which proves how naff I appear to employers. It was even the first
> > interview, no other application got that far.
>
> Er, hold on a moment. You got a job at your _first_ interview?
>
> I repeat - you got a job at your *FIRST* interview? And you think you
> appear crap to employers?
Not only that, but you now have something you didn't have before... an
employement history. Even if it is a job you hate.
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5713 ] |
Do, 31 März 2005 03:46 |
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> [3] Happy birthday to me, wish people would ignore it, not worth
> celebrating anyway.
Yeah, well, someday you may have kids, and then there's no chance of it
being ignored. At least mine are old enough that I can tell them we're
going to celebrate on Saturday, not today, because I'm not getting home
until a rediculous hour, anyway.
Happy birthday to you, anyway. And me too.
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| Re: Boring, nothing to see [message #5715 ] |
Do, 31 März 2005 04:22 |
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CKRone wrote:
> Some boring stuff, don't bother to read, just me (Eriol, CKRone,
> whatever) being pathetic.
>
> I hate my job, been in it now for 3 1/2 years, first job since
> graduating, and am so peed off with it. There is no enjoyment at
all,
> no fulfillment, nothing [1]. Oh, and a low wage.
>
> Problem is I don't have the self confidence to believe that there is
> anything better for me to do. Besides, it took me a year to get this
> one, which proves how naff I appear to employers. It was even the
first
> interview, no other application got that far.
>
> I doubt my degree will be any help as I can barely remember the
> important bits [2], and any future employer would most likely just
think
> of how much a waste the university time was. And they would probably
be
> right, as I pretty much phased out in my final year because I wasn't
> sure if I wanted to be there any more anyway.
>
> I know, I'm pathetic aren't I.
>
> Think, and get some help from here, about going to NZ, but after a
few
> weeks of research my drive just buggers off and hides somewhere, the
> thought of looking for a new job whilst having a job seems pointless,
> but the thought of quitting without any plans seems silly, even
though I
> keep thinking of doing just that. I just never get round to actually
> handing my notice in, even when I have it in my pocket ready and
> waiting.
>
> Don't have a clue what I want to do even if I did quit, as I quite
> honestly don't know what I would like to spend most of my days doing,
> other than not much apart from reading, watching crap and going on
the
> net.
>
> I don't even know why I'm posting this, as anyone reading it would
> probably fall asleep through sheer boredom anyway.
>
> What is the point of existing if you have no place to go? No route
to
> get there?
>
> *sigh*
>
> 30 today [3] , live with parents, no life, very few, if any friends,
no
> hope, no future. What is the point? Why even continue?
You had other plans?
> [1] NHS, mini supervisor, forecasting waiting times. Oh the joy.
> [2] Computer Science, I can't code or anything like that to save my
> life...
> [3] Happy birthday to me, wish people would ignore it, not worth
> celebrating anyway.
I dunno. I think you're pretty amazing. 4 billion years of time on
this planet, most of it just bacteria, a long spell of overgrown
crocodiles and so forth, mice, miniature horses, monkeys and such and
then here you are. A creature that can look at the moving sky and
realise that it's a more or less stationary sky that the entire planet
is moving through. Thousands of continual chemical processes that
cause you to hear, to see, to smell, taste, touch, think, imagine. Let
alone walking on two legs - I'm presuming (if mistaken, I apologise).
Look at how long it takes to learn that, it's /hard/, and you do it
without thinking. And /language/. It's wonderful.
You seem to be short of goals, yes. Possibly you've been distracted
from likely actual life goals, such as getting laid, by gratifications
such as reading or fantasising about saving the world which are easier
to achieve. But the mundane stuff is important and potentially as
rewarding. Pay it attention.
I suppose you could take up smoking in order to have the challenge of
giving it up... bad idea.
Doing a job you don't like is only worthwhile for the money. If you
don't need money, you have the option to say screw 'em. If there is
something else that you are confident you'd find more rewarding - not
necessarily better paid, and not necessarily using your degree (and
here's a tip, in many jobs you aren't supposed to remember what your
degree was about, your employer won't) - maybe working more closely
with people, doing something immediately constructive - then make that
a goal. Find out about appropriate training. If you have to pay for
that yourself, it may be worthwhile.
While looking for a new job, it is worth hanging on to the old one.
There is a strong prejudice amongst employers against the unemployed.
This isn't fair and may not seem to make sense, but it's so. However,
you could switch the current job for another that's only somewhat
better as a stepping stone towards your real goal.
Someone mentioned depression. Take it from me, you can be depressed to
the point of requiring prescription medicine to fix you and you don't
know it. One catch is that a depressed outlook is likely to be more
realistic than most people's, but it is still unhealthy. It's a bit
like, um, in Pterry's _Sourcery_, is it?, the Klatchian coffee that
makes you knurd - drunk in reverse. However, alcohol is not a good
remedy if you start off out of kilter.
New Zealand is an okay place by all accounts, but if you're depressed
now then relocating to New Zealand to be depressed there will not help
you much. Identify something you actually want, long term, let
yourself want it, then go get it.
If this involves trying to pick up nurses in bars then why not?
Everyone says they're up for it. Keep trying. Try to get rejected by
every individual member of the sexual orientation of your preference.
You may fail.
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5718 ] |
Do, 31 März 2005 05:42 |
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> "CKRone" <seeker_2001 [at] yahoo.com> wrote:
> > I hate my job, been in it now for 3 1/2 years, first job since
> > graduating, and am so peed off with it. There is no enjoyment at
all,
> > no fulfillment, nothing [1]. Oh, and a low wage.
not much to add to the great advice flooding in from all
directions, except that I think it's good that you've said
"I don't like how my life is right now" because it puts you
in a great place to say "how am I going to make it better?"
(please do this: don't just wallow in your sadness!)
see a doctor, see a therapist - no harm in getting good
advice :-)
either person is likely to ask you (well, they asked me)
what you are doing in your life that you enjoy
get into habits of doing things that you enjoy . . .
go for a walk/sit under a tree/swim/paint/read/
hot bath/listen to ISIHAC on BBC7/get a dog/
learn to play the recorder/volunteer to do morning tea/
get a massage(bliss!)/meet a friend/garden/etc/etc
- these things will help you survive
- other decisions (about making your life better) might take
longer
if you find you cannot, on purpose, do one thing that
you enjoy, today is a good day to make an appointment with
a doctor or therapist!!!
also, Len Oil wrote:
> <snip stuff about phone call and call centres>
Last time I had a phone call trying to sell me something
(I can't even remember what) I asked for the name and billing
address of the person's employer: "I'm happy to listen to you,
I will charge $n per minute, is that acceptable?"
(call centre drone, slightly confused and rather irresponsible :-)
"yeah, why not?"
"OK, I'll just start my timer"
- I sent them a bill, but strangely enough they
haven't paid it . . .
Jade
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5723 ] |
Do, 31 März 2005 06:30 |
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> <snip first lot>
>
> Think, and get some help from here, about going to NZ, but after a few
> weeks of research my drive just buggers off and hides somewhere, the
> thought of looking for a new job whilst having a job seems pointless,
> but the thought of quitting without any plans seems silly, even though I
> keep thinking of doing just that. I just never get round to actually
> handing my notice in, even when I have it in my pocket ready and
> waiting.
Dude, been there, done that. And you know what? Just quiting one day
was the best thing I could have done. It forced me to make some
decisions that I otherwise would not have made. And I'm much better
off for it.
Oh yes. I live in NZ, and while I can't promise it will be any better
than where you are now, it will be different and that might just be
what you need. Even if it's only for a (maybe extended)
holiday...anyway, not very clear point is sometimes you have to
challenge yourself in order to get what you want.
>
> Don't have a clue what I want to do even if I did quit, as I quite
> honestly don't know what I would like to spend most of my days doing,
> other than not much apart from reading, watching crap and going on the
> net.
>
> I don't even know why I'm posting this, as anyone reading it would
> probably fall asleep through sheer boredom anyway.
>
> What is the point of existing if you have no place to go? No route to
> get there?
You do have a place to go, you just haven't checked your ticket yet.
>
> *sigh*
>
> 30 today [3] , live with parents, no life, very few, if any friends, no
> hope, no future. What is the point? Why even continue?
No future? No future?? When you have at least tried to make plans
(going somewhere else, possibly quitting your job....who knows what
else) how can you say no future? Its there, you just gotta grab it.
And if it helps, I was in the same position and the combination of
antidepressants and counselling helped a pile. I would seriously
recommend at least talking to someone.
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5730 ] |
Do, 31 März 2005 10:37 |
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You *need* to register with these people. I couldn't tell you the last
time I had an telemarketing call. In fact, I'm not sure I've ever had
one.
http://www.tpsonline.org.uk/tps/
Peter
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5740 ] |
Do, 31 März 2005 12:09 |
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In article <d2fbf6$8vn$1$8302bc10 [at] news.demon.co.uk>, Len Oil
<lenoil [at] lenoil.demon.co.uk> wrote:
[snip]
> And then I also get a lot of "Congratulations, you've won a
> holiday!" recorded messages, some of them devious, some of them
> charming, some of them with 090x numbers, one (once) wanted be to
> dial "33 0800 somethingelse", which (as far as I was bothered to
> find out, without trying) didn't even sound like it would work, but
> I could be wrong and
> could have been an "expensive hiding as freephone" scam. I had one
> from Disney that just kept repeating ("press 1 now, or call 0800
> ...") and I admit I let it keep repeating over and over and over
> until (half an hour later) the phone complained it was off the hook
> with no active call. That was more malicious than usual, but it
> felt good at the time. ;)
>
> (I've also tried to track down a UK number to report these things
> to, e.g. to OfTel or OfCom, or whatever they are now, but the
> closest I ever got was the "Nuisance and Abusive Calls" line
> operated by BT, and while I was waiting and waiting and waiting for
> someone to pick up I decided it wasn't quite the right place to go
> and eventually hung up...)
Report any 09x numbers to ICSTIS <http://www.icstis.org.uk/> - they
can (and do) impose large fines on occasion.
From their website:
ICSTIS can help you with the following types of numbers:
- Premium rate numbers prefixed 09 that are 11 digits in length.
- International numbers prefixed with 00 that provide a product
or service.
- Directory Enquiry services prefixed with 118 that are 6 digits
in length.
- Mobile phone text shortcodes prefixed with 2, 6 or 8 that are 4
or 5 digits in length.
- 0800 REVERSE services. Enter 08007383773 if you wish to
complain about this service.
All other prefixes such as 087, 07 and regular local numbers (01
and 02) do not fall within the ICSTIS remit and cannot be checked
via our website. We recommend that you contact your phone company
in the first instance for further advice.
HTH
--
Rob Skedgell <rob+news [at] nephelococcygia.demon.co.uk>
From: address is a spamtrap, Reply-To: is valid.
GnuPG/PGP: 7DA3 1579 C0DD 8748 C05A B984 E2A2 3234 D14B 6DD7
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5741 ] |
Do, 31 März 2005 12:15 |
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Peter Ellis wrote ...
> You *need* to register with these people. I couldn't tell you the last
> time I had an telemarketing call. In fact, I'm not sure I've ever had
> one.
>
> http://www.tpsonline.org.uk/tps/
>
Seconded - another advantage is that if anyone DOES call and you say you are
TPS registered they tend to apologise and go away in a hurry. (Which is
nice.)
Unfortunately it doesn't protect against recorded automated calls tellng you
in saccharine american tones what a wonderful prize you've won, even though
this is illegal in the UK. All you can do with those is hang up and wait for
them to go away when the recording ends.
You can also register mobile numbers.
Rgemini, who shall remain sigless
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5745 ] |
Do, 31 März 2005 13:16 |
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From the Collected Witterings of Peter Ellis, volume 23:
> You *need* to register with these people. I couldn't tell you the last
> time I had an telemarketing call. In fact, I'm not sure I've ever had
> one.
We've frequently had calls since registering for the TPS. It's now standard
practice for telemarketing comapnies to use caller ID blocking and to
instruct their scum^Woperators to hang up if asked what company they work
for.
--
Who the f--k are you calling insolent?
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5746 ] |
Do, 31 März 2005 13:34 |
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CKRone wrote:
> Problem is I don't have the self confidence to believe that there is
> anything better for me to do.
You've identified the problem - now you can solve it.
> I doubt my degree will be any help as I can barely remember the
> important bits ...
Same here (though I had to leave on financial grounds with just an
HND). It doesn't matter once you get a job that uses the
qualifications - you end up remembering what's important, and the rest
is just history...!
> Don't have a clue what I want to do even if I did quit, as I quite
> honestly don't know what I would like to spend most of my days doing,
> other than not much apart from reading, watching crap and going on
the
> net.
Use that degree! It's weird that you have qualifications that mean
something (i.e. not something stupid like a degree in Madonna Studies)
but haven't got a job that really uses it. You work in the NHS - use
the website to find a job that is more your thing. Living at home, you
can apply anywhere in the country and then get a flat/house locally -
perfect way to beat the doldrums.
> What is the point of existing if you have no place to go? No route
to
> get there?
You might find it tomorrow - that's the point.
> 30 today [3] , live with parents, no life, very few, if any friends,
no
> hope, no future. What is the point? Why even continue?
Get a flat, get a beer, get a pet and you'll find there's less time to
feel sorry for yourself in. Set up/attend a local afp meet and then
you instantly have friends to talk to/potentially go out with, and you
will have done something positive.
Oh, and Happy Birthday! You're only as old as the woman you feel...
don't stress about this either - things happen if you let them. Don't
let your depression get in the way of a chance. You wouldn't believe
how much I know this advice to be true, because I've been there. The
only way is to get out of your chair and make contact with other
people. Good luck! And if you're anywhere near Leeds in Yorkshire on
23rd April, for goodness sake follow the thread and come to our meet
(when we've finished organising it!)
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5747 ] |
Do, 31 März 2005 14:01 |
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In article <mIydnV3N4IdZUNbfRVnygQ [at] pipex.net>, Rgemini
<roy.OMIT.ayres.OMIT [at] dsl.OMIT.pipex.com> wrote:
> Peter Ellis wrote ...
>> You *need* to register with these people. I couldn't tell you the
>> last
>> time I had an telemarketing call. In fact, I'm not sure I've ever
>> had one.
>>
>> http://www.tpsonline.org.uk/tps/
>>
>
> Seconded - another advantage is that if anyone DOES call and you
> say you are TPS registered they tend to apologise and go away in a
> hurry. (Which is nice.)
>
> Unfortunately it doesn't protect against recorded automated calls
> tellng you in saccharine american tones what a wonderful prize
> you've won, even though this is illegal in the UK. All you can do
> with those is hang up and wait for them to go away when the
> recording ends.
>
> You can also register mobile numbers.
Bear in mind that TPS listings only stop companies who wish to act
responsibly. Complaints to TPS (run by the Direct Marketing
Association[0]) tend to result in a letter with no information which
allows it to be correlated with a specific complaint, and no action
taken. A TPS listing is still useful in dramatically reducing the
volume of calls, but IME no use at all for callers who do not care
that they are acting unlawfully, other than to warn you that they
will probably act dishonestly in all other matters.
[0] No possible conflict of interest, then.
--
Rob Skedgell <rob+news [at] nephelococcygia.demon.co.uk>
From: address is a spamtrap, Reply-To: is valid.
GnuPG/PGP: 7DA3 1579 C0DD 8748 C05A B984 E2A2 3234 D14B 6DD7
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5753 ] |
Do, 31 März 2005 15:44 |
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On Wed, 30 Mar 2005 20:00:13 +0100, CKRone wrote in
<amtl41l39estnf91ob3dlq2uabljfs74of [at] 4ax.com>, seen in
alt.fan.pratchett:
Stevie D has said some good things, which I hopefully won't repeat,
and others have suggested counselling; from personal experience I will
tell you that counselling either works or it doesn't work at all, and
only you can know whether it is any use to you.
[...]
> I hate my job, been in it now for 3 1/2 years, first job since
> graduating, and am so peed off with it. There is no enjoyment at all,
> no fulfillment, nothing [1]. Oh, and a low wage.
Yup, know the feeling. I'm fortunate enough that I managed a move
within my organisation to a job I thought I didn't want and would hate
(but the other option was resigning and what could I do in the world?)
- and when I actually got the job discovered that it was the square
hole I'd been looking for rather than the round hole I'd been trying
to fit into before.
The only good thing about the round hole job was that the pay was
good, but that in itself is a problem because you know that if you
leave the job, you're not going to be able to maintain the lifestyle
you're used to. :(
> Problem is I don't have the self confidence to believe that there is
> anything better for me to do. Besides, it took me a year to get this
> one, which proves how naff I appear to employers. It was even the first
> interview, no other application got that far.
I was on the dole for 2 years before I joined the railway. 90% of
letters I wrote were ignored, 9% got "Sorry, not interested" responses
and of the other 1%, well, every interview I went to resulted in the
traditional "Sorry, you're overqualified/inexperienced so good-bye".
It gets a trifle depressing, doesn't it? :(
> I doubt my degree will be any help as I can barely remember the
> important bits [2], and any future employer would most likely just think
> of how much a waste the university time was.
In all honesty, from a non-degreed-point-of-view, I'm not sure how
many employers pay any attention other than to use them as an excuse
to say "No". Same as with my 'O' levels; the only time any prospective
employer referred to them was to tell me that with my qualifications I
should be "setting my sights higher" than the job they were offering,
oh, and good-bye and best of luck for the future. <sigh>
[...]
> I know, I'm pathetic aren't I.
No, just suffering from the stress of a crap job. We all do that.
[...]
> the thought of quitting without any plans seems silly, even though I
> keep thinking of doing just that. I just never get round to actually
> handing my notice in, even when I have it in my pocket ready and
> waiting.
Don't do it. Really. I've nearly done it myself; at one point my
mother cut the connection as I was phoning in to tell the company to
stick the job. She was right, although it took a long time to admit it
and I hated her for it at the time.
[...]
> What is the point of existing if you have no place to go? No route to
> get there?
> *sigh*
> 30 today [3] , live with parents, no life, very few, if any friends, no
> hope, no future. What is the point? Why even continue?
I know that tune, too, as I've been singing it for quite a while.
35 this year, still hate birthdays, live alone (moved out 5 years ago
when the change of job meant moving 100 miles away), no life that I
think worth having, few friends (and I too sometimes wonder if "few"
really means "if any", no girlfriend (and when I do meet someone they
generally turn out to be interested in what they can get *from* me
rather than *in* me), and a distinct lack of interest in socialising
in the usual work-pub-football fashion which appears to be the norm in
this part of the world.
Oh, and a fatal accident last December which means I've been off work
since and I've all the more time to think "What am I doing with my
life? Surely there's supposed to be more to it than this?"
From my own experience, I suspect that there's no point anyone making
comforting noises; they don't work. All you can do is keep trucking at
it and hope that in time something will change and at least one part
of life will improve; in my case I got the change of career which
improved things and also gave the money and ability to travel around
Europe at least once a year. Hang on in there. :-)
--
Ross, in Lincoln
Reply-to address will bounce; replace "junk-trap" with "me" for e-mail
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5755 ] |
Do, 31 März 2005 17:22 |
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On Wed, 30 Mar 2005 23:52:15 +0100, Len Oil wrote in
<d2fbf6$8vn$1$8302bc10 [at] news.demon.co.uk>, seen in alt.fan.pratchett:
> I'm /not/ registered to the Telephone Preference Service, but
> I know (from friends' experiences) that'll only stop the ones that have
> scruples and don't call from abroad, anyway, so maybe I could do more,
Get an answerphone. If you recognise the number on the caller display,
pick up before it kicks in. If you don't, or it's withheld, let the
answerphone pick up.
If they want to speak to you they'll wait out the message and speak
after the tone. If they're trying it on, or machine-dialling, they
won't.
Makes life much easier, unless of course you want to stress out some
poor sod who probably doesn't want to have to be on the phone to you
anyway but has to feed him/herself somehow. :)
For stress relief, I used to fire up a copy of Doom go into God mode,
discard all weapons so I'd only got fists to fight with and beat the
living Hell out of every monster in sight. Mind you, it's a number of
years since I had to do that do de-stress after work...
If I'd ever worked in a call centre I suspect I'd have spent most of
my off-duty time doing that. Dealing with rail passengers (and
managers!) was bad enough.
--
Ross, in Lincoln
Reply-to address will bounce; replace "junk-trap" with "me" for e-mail
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5769 ] |
Do, 31 März 2005 13:13 |
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Stevie D wrote:
> If you aren't really sure what to do, how about going to an agency?
> You might end up doing short-term temp work for a while, but at least
> it will show you a variety of jobs and employers, which will put you
> in better stead for looking for something long-term, and will reduce
> the pressure to find and accept a job quickly if you aren't sure that
> it's the right one for you.
Seconded. I actually took the plunge and quit my last job without having
any clue what to do next, on the basis that I'd had enough. I've spent
the last year working through a temp agency doing shortish-term jobs.
This has meant I got to see lots of jobs (mostly boring ones, but
different ones), and met lots of new people.
It so happened that during this time I realised what I really wanted to
do (hopefully. We'll see.). This might have happened anyway - I have no
way of knowing - but I suspect not. Regular changes of jobs keeps your
brain engaged a little and constantly provides new experiences. And who
knows, you might even be lucky enough to like one of the temp jobs and
have that company offer you something longer-term.
Good luck.
--
Dark Spot: n. An area of the stage which the lighting designer has
inexplicably forgotten to light, and which has a magnetic attraction
for the first-time actor. A dark spot is never evident before opening
night.
------------------------------------------------------------ ---
Simon Waldman, UK email: swaldman [at] firecloud.org.uk
------------------------------------------------------------ ---
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| Re: Boring, nothing to see [message #5782 ] |
Do, 31 März 2005 21:36 |
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> <snip>
> I dunno. I think you're pretty amazing. 4 billion years of time on
> this planet, most of it just bacteria, a long spell of overgrown
> crocodiles and so forth, mice, miniature horses, monkeys and such and
> then here you are. A creature that can look at the moving sky and
> realise that it's a more or less stationary sky that the entire planet
> is moving through. Thousands of continual chemical processes that
> cause you to hear, to see, to smell, taste, touch, think, imagine. Let
> alone walking on two legs - I'm presuming (if mistaken, I apologise).
> Look at how long it takes to learn that, it's /hard/, and you do it
> without thinking. And /language/. It's wonderful.
>
> You seem to be short of goals, yes. Possibly you've been distracted
> from likely actual life goals, such as getting laid, by gratifications
> such as reading or fantasising about saving the world which are easier
> to achieve. But the mundane stuff is important and potentially as
> rewarding. Pay it attention.
>
> I suppose you could take up smoking in order to have the challenge of
> giving it up... bad idea.
>
> Doing a job you don't like is only worthwhile for the money. If you
> don't need money, you have the option to say screw 'em. If there is
> something else that you are confident you'd find more rewarding - not
> necessarily better paid, and not necessarily using your degree (and
> here's a tip, in many jobs you aren't supposed to remember what your
> degree was about, your employer won't) - maybe working more closely
> with people, doing something immediately constructive - then make that
> a goal. Find out about appropriate training. If you have to pay for
> that yourself, it may be worthwhile.
>
> While looking for a new job, it is worth hanging on to the old one.
> There is a strong prejudice amongst employers against the unemployed.
> This isn't fair and may not seem to make sense, but it's so. However,
> you could switch the current job for another that's only somewhat
> better as a stepping stone towards your real goal.
>
> Someone mentioned depression. Take it from me, you can be depressed to
> the point of requiring prescription medicine to fix you and you don't
> know it. One catch is that a depressed outlook is likely to be more
> realistic than most people's, but it is still unhealthy. It's a bit
> like, um, in Pterry's _Sourcery_, is it?, the Klatchian coffee that
> makes you knurd - drunk in reverse. However, alcohol is not a good
> remedy if you start off out of kilter.
>
> New Zealand is an okay place by all accounts, but if you're depressed
> now then relocating to New Zealand to be depressed there will not help
> you much. Identify something you actually want, long term, let
> yourself want it, then go get it.
>
> If this involves trying to pick up nurses in bars then why not?
> Everyone says they're up for it. Keep trying. Try to get rejected by
> every individual member of the sexual orientation of your preference.
> You may fail.
Fantastic advice all round. Especially the last bit.
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5785 ] |
Do, 31 März 2005 21:38 |
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< [at] lec ©awley <alec [at] spamspam.co.uk>> wrote:
> In article <eKudnY3v-KT8mtbfRVnyjw [at] pipex.net>,=20
> roy.OMIT.ayres.OMIT [at] dsl.OMIT.pipex.com says...
> > Biggest obstacle is the one you've put your finger on - depression. If you
> > really feel like this all the time then the first thing you ought to do is
> > see a properly trained counsellor.=20
>
> Or a doctor - anti-depressants are sometimes (but not always) the right=20
> solution. They work for me. Which is not to knock counsellors, who can=20
> also be the right solution - my wife is one.
A good counsellor will refer you to a doctor when necessary, and vice
versa.
Richard
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5798 ] |
Do, 31 März 2005 22:04 |
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Richard Bos rlb [at] hoekstra-uitgeverij.nl wrote:
> < [at] lec ©awley <alec [at] spamspam.co.uk>> wrote:
>
> > In article <eKudnY3v-KT8mtbfRVnyjw [at] pipex.net>,=20
> > roy.OMIT.ayres.OMIT [at] dsl.OMIT.pipex.com says...
> > > Biggest obstacle is the one you've put your finger on - depression. If you
> > > really feel like this all the time then the first thing you ought to do is
> > > see a properly trained counsellor.=20
> >
> > Or a doctor - anti-depressants are sometimes (but not always) the right=20
> > solution. They work for me. Which is not to knock counsellors, who can=20
> > also be the right solution - my wife is one.
>
> A good counsellor will refer you to a doctor when necessary, and vice
> versa.
>
The key thing is to find a medical professional you trust to put your
interests first, it doesn't matter if they are a counsellor, therapist,
psychologist, psychiatrist, or GP, if they are any good they'll refer you
to the others as necessary.
The other thing worth keeping in mind is that a huge proportion of people
will have some form of psychiatric problem at some point in their life,
and that's using the figures for problems that are diagnosed, billions of
people never realise there's a problem. It's normal.
--
eric - afprelationships in headers
www.ericjarvis.co.uk
"live fast, die only if strictly necessary"
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5831 ] |
Fr, 01 April 2005 01:37 |
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> (I've also tried to track down a UK number to report these things to,
> e.g. to OfTel or OfCom, or whatever they are now, but the closest I ever
> got was the "Nuisance and Abusive Calls" line operated by BT, and while
> I was waiting and waiting and waiting for someone to pick up I decided
> it wasn't quite the right place to go and eventually hung up...)
Well, call/write to your local <UK version of congressman>, and ask them
to institute a UK version of the No-call list that the colonies did.
Point out the advantages of gaining tax revenues... er, fines... from
companies who ignore the law-- because this is one revenue source that
nobody's going to complain about-- or if they do, nobody's going to
care.
Three telemarketing calls in the last three years... and they all got
off as fast as they could when it sounded like I was taking information
down to pass along to the feds.
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5883 ] |
Fr, 01 April 2005 15:56 |
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Rob Skedgell wrote:
> Complaints to TPS (run by the Direct Marketing
> Association[0])
<snip>
>
> [0] No possible conflict of interest, then.
Not really. People who register for TPS are mostly going to be people
who would not buy products that were advertised to them over the phone,
and so the DMA members save money in not phoning them.
Probably.
--
"If all else fails, immortality can always be
assured by spectacular error."
-- John Kenneth Galbraith
------------------------------------------------------------ ---
Simon Waldman, UK email: swaldman [at] firecloud.org.uk
------------------------------------------------------------ ---
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5894 ] |
Fr, 01 April 2005 18:08 |
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In article <qh00i2-5i7.ln1 [at] blue.firecloud.org.uk>, Simon Waldman
<swaldman [at] firecloud.org.uk> wrote:
> Rob Skedgell wrote:
>> Complaints to TPS (run by the Direct Marketing
>> Association[0])
>
> <snip>
>>
>> [0] No possible conflict of interest, then.
>
> Not really. People who register for TPS are mostly going to be
> people who would not buy products that were advertised to them over
> the phone, and so the DMA members save money in not phoning them.
>
> Probably.
>
I would have no argument with the above if not making unsolicited
marketing calls were a voluntary scheme. SI 2003 No 2426 regulations
21 and 26 are not a voluntary scheme.
The DMA are probably the best people to maintain and distribute the
list, for precisely the reasons you give. It is the complaints and
enforcement side of the regulations that should IMO be kept out of
the DMA's control.
--
Rob Skedgell <rob+news [at] nephelococcygia.demon.co.uk>
From: address is a spamtrap, Reply-To: is valid.
GnuPG/PGP: 7DA3 1579 C0DD 8748 C05A B984 E2A2 3234 D14B 6DD7
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5929 ] |
Do, 31 März 2005 21:12 |
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"Jade" <jtr102030 [at] yahoo.com> wrote:
> also, Len Oil wrote:
> > <snip stuff about phone call and call centres>
>
> Last time I had a phone call trying to sell me something
> (I can't even remember what) I asked for the name and billing
> address of the person's employer: "I'm happy to listen to you,
> I will charge $n per minute, is that acceptable?"
>
> (call centre drone, slightly confused and rather irresponsible :-)
> "yeah, why not?"
>
> "OK, I'll just start my timer"
>
> - I sent them a bill, but strangely enough they
> haven't paid it . . .
I'd love to do something like that, I must admit, but if I think I have
time to spare at the beginning I'm usually anticipating the fun and miss
my chance... If I were legally allowed to record them (without all that
fuss of telling them about it) I might do that, though...
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| Re: Boring, nothing to see [message #5945 ] |
Sa, 02 April 2005 01:56 |
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Simon Waldman wrote:
> Rob Skedgell wrote:
> > Complaints to TPS (run by the Direct Marketing
> > Association[0])
>
> <snip>
> >
> > [0] No possible conflict of interest, then.
>
> Not really. People who register for TPS are mostly going to be people
> who would not buy products that were advertised to them over the
phone,
> and so the DMA members save money in not phoning them.
>
> Probably.
I suggest the same logic should apply to sending spam to people who
have basic anti-spam measures installed, but apparently it doesn't.
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| Re: Boring, nothing to see [message #5967 ] |
Sa, 02 April 2005 10:42 |
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rja.carnegie [at] excite.com wrote:
> Simon Waldman wrote:
>>Not really. People who register for TPS are mostly going to be people
>>who would not buy products that were advertised to them over the
> phone,
>>and so the DMA members save money in not phoning them.
>>
>>Probably.
>
>
> I suggest the same logic should apply to sending spam to people who
> have basic anti-spam measures installed, but apparently it doesn't.
No - it's a cost vs. probability of benefit question.
Phoning somebody who is on the TPS list takes a few minutes of a staff
member's time, which is worth a significant amount. As somebody on the
list has a low probability of buying something, it isn't worth it.
Sending another copy of a spam costs from very little to nothing,
depending on the methods being used. As somebody who has requested no
spam has a very small, but non-zero probability of buying something,
it's still worthwhile.
--
"Democracy is the art of running the circus from
the monkey cage." -- H. L. Mencken
------------------------------------------------------------ ---
Simon Waldman, UK email: swaldman [at] firecloud.org.uk
------------------------------------------------------------ ---
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5970 ] |
Sa, 02 April 2005 11:04 |
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> 30 today [3] , live with parents, no life, very few, if any friends, no
> hope, no future. What is the point? Why even continue?
As the nice people have already said, find a counsellor you can talk
to and trust (be selective) and see your GP about anti-despressents.
Also think of a short course of Cognitive Based Therapy - it's the
fastest most reliable fix for depression, then you can follow up with
eg Client Centered Therapy if you want to do the Tony Soprano thing.
> [1] NHS, mini supervisor, forecasting waiting times. Oh the joy.
> [2] Computer Science, I can't code or anything like that to save my
> life...
Most people who take CS degrees can't code when they leave, including
people who go on to teach them (which is probably the problem). Buy a
copies of, oh, Code Complete, and Programming Pearls and work through
them. Python is probably a good choice as a learning language - much
less of a pain in the ass than C++ or Java - download it, buy a Python
book, switch to C++ or Java when your momentum is up. That's if you
*want* to learn to code.
> [3] Happy birthday to me, wish people would ignore it, not worth
> celebrating anyway.
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #5973 ] |
Sa, 02 April 2005 11:25 |
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On 2 Apr 2005 01:04:24 -0800, JC
<umptious [at] gmail.com> wrote:
>
>Python is probably a good choice as a learning language
Ick! White space should *not* be significant.
Why not a language that was designed for teaching programming, like
Pascal?
>- much
>less of a pain in the ass than C++ or Java - download it, buy a Python
>book, switch to C++ or Java when your momentum is up. That's if you
>*want* to learn to code.
--
Andy Brown
A bleeding heart can be hell on the carpeting.
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| Re: Boring, nothing to see [message #5977 ] |
Sa, 02 April 2005 12:06 |
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jester wrote:
> On 2 Apr 2005 01:04:24 -0800, JC
> <umptious [at] gmail.com> wrote:
> >
> >Python is probably a good choice as a learning language
>
> Ick! White space should *not* be significant.
> Why not a language that was designed for teaching programming, like
> Pascal?
I'd vote for one that does something useful - that is, one that is used
for real work. Pascal can be; Borland's tools are excellent.
These days, visual programming tools are very much in vogue.
I took up Java a couple of years ago but my head got tied into
Klein-bottle shape trying to grok it. I left off because, although my
employer had suggested it, I wasn't being paid to learn it. This may
have been a mistake.
I actually do SQL professionally now, which is quite frustrating
because you can't build an entire application, or even a form, using
SQL. Someone else has to build the bit that has buttons to press, and
it's they who get their name on it.
Web scripting languages - now there's your prospect of employement
going forward.
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #16453 ] |
Sa, 02 April 2005 14:50 |
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Boyd Bottorff said:
>Stevie D <stevieinyork [at] yahoo.co.uk> wrote:
>
>> > Problem is I don't have the self confidence to believe that there is
>> > anything better for me to do. Besides, it took me a year to get this
>> > one, which proves how naff I appear to employers. It was even the first
>> > interview, no other application got that far.
>>
>> Er, hold on a moment. You got a job at your _first_ interview?
>>
>> I repeat - you got a job at your *FIRST* interview? And you think you
>> appear crap to employers?
>
>Not only that, but you now have something you didn't have before... an
>employement history. Even if it is a job you hate.
Have a basic one through school, college and university placements.
Nothing else though.
--
CKRone
ku.gro.nesnub [at] enorkc Ooh look, reverse me.
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #16454 ] |
Sa, 02 April 2005 14:50 |
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Ross said:
>On Wed, 30 Mar 2005 20:00:13 +0100, CKRone wrote in
><amtl41l39estnf91ob3dlq2uabljfs74of [at] 4ax.com>, seen in
>alt.fan.pratchett:
>
>Stevie D has said some good things, which I hopefully won't repeat,
>and others have suggested counselling; from personal experience I will
>tell you that counselling either works or it doesn't work at all, and
>only you can know whether it is any use to you.
The difficulty of course is getting the confidence to actually visit a
counsellor at all, and then being able to say anything to them once you
are there...
>
>[...]
>> I hate my job, been in it now for 3 1/2 years, first job since
>> graduating, and am so peed off with it. There is no enjoyment at all,
>> no fulfillment, nothing [1]. Oh, and a low wage.
>
>Yup, know the feeling. I'm fortunate enough that I managed a move
>within my organisation to a job I thought I didn't want and would hate
>(but the other option was resigning and what could I do in the world?).
There are internal vacancies at mine which look okay, but when I check
the requirements I don't meet some of them, so I just don't go further.
Same with any other job I look into.
>- and when I actually got the job discovered that it was the square
>hole I'd been looking for rather than the round hole I'd been trying
>to fit into before.
That would be a nice thing to find.
>
>The only good thing about the round hole job was that the pay was
>good, but that in itself is a problem because you know that if you
>leave the job, you're not going to be able to maintain the lifestyle
>you're used to. :(
Not a problem for me, due to being on low pay at the moment anyway, and
my lifestyle consists of hiding in my room most of the time anyway. The
plus being that I have a good savings pot ready for a house deposit, or
a long trip to NZ, if I can ever get back into that.
>> Problem is I don't have the self confidence to believe that there is
>> anything better for me to do. [snip]
>
>I was on the dole for 2 years before I joined the railway. 90% of
>letters I wrote were ignored, 9% got "Sorry, not interested" responses
>and of the other 1%, well, every interview I went to resulted in the
>traditional "Sorry, you're overqualified/inexperienced so good-bye".
>
>It gets a trifle depressing, doesn't it? :(
And very annoying.
>[...]+++
>> I know, I'm pathetic aren't I.
>
>No, just suffering from the stress of a crap job. We all do that.
What is stress? There isn't a single question, and anyone who sees me,
myself included, can't see it, although you are probably close to
corret.
>
>
>[...]
>> the thought of quitting without any plans seems silly, even though I
>> keep thinking of doing just that. I just never get round to actually
>> handing my notice in, even when I have it in my pocket ready and
>> waiting.
>
>Don't do it. Really. I've nearly done it myself; at one point my
>mother cut the connection as I was phoning in to tell the company to
>stick the job. She was right, although it took a long time to admit it
>and I hated her for it at the time.
This is the problem with that. You get all the answers you want to the
question about quitting. "Yes, I did it and found another job with no
problems", "No, employers will think you are a slacker/idiot/etc",
"Maybe, but it can be easier to get a job if you have a job". For me,
if I did quit tomorrow, I'd probably bugger off somewhere short term,
say a month somewhere holiday-type.
>[...] +++
>> 30 today [3] , live with parents, no life, very few, if any friends, no
>> hope, no future. What is the point? Why even continue?
>
>I know that tune, too, as I've been singing it for quite a while.
Does it sync with Dark Side of the Moon?
>35 this year, still hate birthdays, live alone (moved out 5 years ago
>when the change of job meant moving 100 miles away), no life that I
>think worth having, few friends (and I too sometimes wonder if "few"
>really means "if any", no girlfriend (and when I do meet someone they
>generally turn out to be interested in what they can get *from* me
>rather than *in* me), and a distinct lack of interest in socialising
>in the usual work-pub-football fashion which appears to be the norm in
>this part of the world.
I don't mind going to the pub, but I prefer lunchtime drinking with a
meal and a gossip to the people I know, if there ever happen to be
anyone I know and I can actually go into a pub.
>Oh, and a fatal accident last December which means I've been off work
>since and I've all the more time to think "What am I doing with my
>life? Surely there's supposed to be more to it than this?"
Time to think doesn't always help, regardless of the cause, I noticed.
>From my own experience, I suspect that there's no point anyone making
>comforting noises; they don't work. All you can do is keep trucking at
>it and hope that in time something will change and at least one part
>of life will improve; in my case I got the change of career which
>improved things and also gave the money and ability to travel around
>Europe at least once a year. Hang on in there. :-)
Thank you. Travelling is something I do want to do. Not had any abroad
holiday since I was 16, and when not at work here I tend to either do
nothing at home (this last two weeks) or go visit my sister and new
nephew (the reason for going on I suppose).
[20p] Always look on the bright side of life.
Doesn't work if both sides are the pits of hell and damnation though,
and all you can see is the dead parrot.
--
CKRone
ku.gro.nesnub [at] enorkc Ooh look, reverse me.
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #16455 ] |
Sa, 02 April 2005 14:50 |
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Clare said:
>
>CKRone wrote:
>
>> Problem is I don't have the self confidence to believe that there is
>> anything better for me to do.
>
>You've identified the problem - now you can solve it.
The solution evades me, hiding behind blades of grass and trees.
>> I doubt my degree will be any help as I can barely remember the
>> important bits ...
>
>Same here (though I had to leave on financial grounds with just an
>HND). It doesn't matter once you get a job that uses the
>qualifications - you end up remembering what's important, and the rest
>is just history...!
True, and this applies to every qualification, from the lowest to the
highest. Refreshment is always needed.
>> Don't have a clue what I want to do even if I did quit, as I quite
>> honestly don't know what I would like to spend most of my days doing,
>> other than not much apart from reading, watching crap and going on
>> the net.
>
>Use that degree! It's weird that you have qualifications that mean
>something (i.e. not something stupid like a degree in Madonna Studies)
>but haven't got a job that really uses it.
My sister has a degree in Business Economics and works in an Orange call
centre. We both did well didn't we. Difference being she seems to get
more out of the job than just money.
>You work in the NHS - use the website to find a job that is more your thing.
I keep looking, then I see the job specification and realise I don't
meet it so stop at that point (sorry about repeating what I say in other
replies).
>Living at home, you can apply anywhere in the country and then get a
>flat/house locally - perfect way to beat the doldrums.
And there is another problem. I know I should do this, apply around the
country/world, but I have always felt at home, well, at home. Moving
away has never really been looked into, even though I know I should, due
to getting another job and actually being able to afford somewhere to
live.
>> What is the point of existing if you have no place to go? No route
>> to get there?
>
>You might find it tomorrow - that's the point.
And that could lead right to something not nice of course. Optimistic
aren't I.
>> 30 today [3] , live with parents, no life, very few, if any friends,
>> no hope, no future. What is the point? Why even continue?
>
>Get a flat, get a beer, get a pet and you'll find there's less time to
>feel sorry for yourself in.
Even renting a flat would be almost beyond my means, but I do keep
looking.
>Set up/attend a local afp meet and then you instantly have friends to
>talk to/potentially go out with, and you will have done something positive.
All those people I don't know. Terrifying thought. Even when I do know
everyone I still have problems. My next-door neighbour had his 18th
party at home (years ago), but I couldn't go because no-one came to get
me...
>The only way is to get out of your chair and make contact with other
>people.
Online is quite easy, if I can get passed the 'write a post, delete
before sending' thing. I don't know how I'm posting this much to be
honest, apart from not giving myself much time to think about what I'm
typing.
>Good luck! And if you're anywhere near Leeds in Yorkshire on
>23rd April, for goodness sake follow the thread and come to our meet
>(when we've finished organising it!)
Seen the thread. Know no-one. Am close to Darlington so not far from
there, but could just as well be a million miles away.
Thanks for the advice though, same to every other poster as well.
--
CKRone
ku.gro.nesnub [at] enorkc Ooh look, reverse me.
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #16456 ] |
Sa, 02 April 2005 14:50 |
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hajime saito said:
>> <snip first lot> <trimmed a bit more>
>>
>> Think, and get some help from here, about going to NZ, but after a few
>> weeks of research my drive just buggers off and hides somewhere, the
>> thought of looking for a new job whilst having a job seems pointless,
>> but the thought of quitting without any plans seems silly, even though I
>> keep thinking of doing just that.
>
>Dude, been there, done that. And you know what? Just quiting one day
>was the best thing I could have done. It forced me to make some
>decisions that I otherwise would not have made.
I keep considering it, but as said in another reply, responses to this
are varied along the lines of Yes / No / Maybe.
>Oh yes. I live in NZ, and while I can't promise it will be any better
>than where you are now, it will be different and that might just be
>what you need. Even if it's only for a (maybe extended)
>holiday...anyway, not very clear point is sometimes you have to
>challenge yourself in order to get what you want.
I was originally planning on 6 months (maximum with no visa), and was
going to post a while ago asking for more advice on it, but the get go
went.
>> What is the point of existing if you have no place to go? No route to
>> get there?
>
>You do have a place to go, you just haven't checked your ticket yet.
One way, or return?
>> 30 today [3] , live with parents, no life, very few, if any friends, no
>> hope, no future. What is the point? Why even continue?
>
>No future? No future?? When you have at least tried to make plans
>(going somewhere else, possibly quitting your job....who knows what
>else) how can you say no future? Its there, you just gotta grab it.
Plans that go nowhere are not really of much use to anyone, least of all
the person pretending to make them. Living more in fantasy than reality
as to the fruition of those plans doesn't help either.
>And if it helps, I was in the same position and the combination of
>antidepressants and counselling helped a pile. I would seriously
>recommend at least talking to someone.
--
CKRone (I know, it would help if I kept the same nick as well, Eriol)
ku.gro.nesnub [at] enorkc Ooh look, reverse me.
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #16457 ] |
Sa, 02 April 2005 14:50 |
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Stevie D said:
>CKRone wrote:
>> Some boring stuff, don't bother to read, just me (Eriol, CKRone,
>> whatever) being pathetic.
>You don't write a message that long if you don't _really_ want people
>to read it.
Unless you are typing direct from brain and hit post before you have a
chance to delete it, which is the fate of most of my messages...
>> I hate my job, been in it now for 3 1/2 years, first job since
>> graduating, and am so peed off with it. There is no enjoyment at all,
>> no fulfillment, nothing [1]. Oh, and a low wage.
>
>You paint a picture of a very unhappy bunny. Without enjoyment or
>fulfilment, the low wage is the least of your worries - as long as you
>can keep a roof over your head and food on your table. Trust me - I
>went from a well(ish) paid job that I hated to a much lower salary but
>doing a job that I enjoy, and it is great!
At the moment, I'd go for a better paid job that I still hate. Can't
think of any job that I would actually like, apart from being a full
time bum, but that doesn't play well if you can't play the system.
>> Problem is I don't have the self confidence to believe that there is
>> anything better for me to do. Besides, it took me a year to get this
>> one, which proves how naff I appear to employers. It was even the first
>> interview, no other application got that far.
>
>Er, hold on a moment. You got a job at your _first_ interview?
Brain was obviously not working very well, was my second, with a very
long gap between.
>I repeat - you got a job at your *FIRST* interview? And you think you
>appear crap to employers?
Two people sat in the room with me, me as crap as I ever am with new
people, stuttering and waffling (for the pointless three words to
describe yourself the first ones I said were short, fat and ugly.). I
really don't understand how you can choose someone on the basis of that
single meeting, as you are never going to get a true look at the
interviewees. They're either going to be slick and reading from an
internal script or just scared.
>Whoa!
>
>With a bit of help, training and practice, _anyone_ can write a good
>CV. Anyone can sell themselves on paper, even if they are no use at
>all (which is definitely not your case) - you just need to write some
>more, get some more advice, write some more, get some more advice,
>repeat til its good. You don't even have to apply for any jobs here,
>just practice writing CVs. Tweak it, amend it, change it, re-word it,
>re-style it - you have all the time in the world to get it right.
More and more jobs do not accept a CV. They only accept applications on
their application form, which asks questions about acheivements, how you
handled situations, etc. My CV has been static now, apart from adding
current employment and updates of basic skills, since getting help from
the Job Centre people a few years back. Is a single page, with
references on a second page.
>I have the opposite problem. I get a fair few interviews - not for
>everything I apply for, but a healthy proportion. And then they decide
>not to give me the job. Interview technique is _much_ harder to
>improve, but yours must be reasonably good - congratulations, you've
>already passed the more difficult of the two!
See above. Interviews are horrible things.
>> I doubt my degree will be any help as I can barely remember the
>> important bits <snip>
>Unless you are going into a very specialised or techie environment,
>its unlikely that any interviewer will be picking over the minutiae of
>your degree course - they will be far more interest that you have a
>degree (ie, have proven some level of intelligence and capacity to
>work), and in how you put yourself across.
As a terrified worm mainly.
<snip>
>> I know, I'm pathetic aren't I.
>
>Not at all. Most people I know don't know what they want to do or how
>to do it; even those that are in jobs that they _do_ enjoy.
Most people I know have some value. And they have lives.
>> the thought of looking for a new job whilst having a job seems
>> pointless, but the thought of quitting without any plans seems silly,
>> even though I keep thinking of doing just that.
>
>If you aren't really sure what to do, how about going to an agency?
What exactly is the procedure with them? There aren't any in my home
town, the nearest being in the same town I work. Also, any job I get
has to be public transport friendly (I can drive, but don't have a car).
That'd be a problem wouldn't it?
<snip>
>> I don't even know why I'm posting this, as anyone reading it would
>> probably fall asleep through sheer boredom anyway.
>
>Yeah, well. I'm not easily bored. And AFP has helped me through
>traumatic times in the past, so it's only fair to pay it forward to
>the next poor sod.
Yep, fair description of me.
>> 30 today [3] , live with parents, no life, very few, if any friends,
>> no hope, no future. What is the point? Why even continue?
>
>So you can prove the nay-saying bastards wrong. In a better job, you
>will feel a different person in no time.
I am the best nay-saying bastard about myself that I know, and of course
I know I'm right...
>You will make friends.
I have never been able to do that, never worked out how. People
occasionaly make friends with me, but never the other way round.
Basically, I have negligible social skills, not helped by my inability
to go into social type places if I don't already know someone in there.
As I have said, pathetic.
>you will make money, you will get a life, you will find a way to set up
>home on your own or sharing with friends. Life will get better. That's
>why.
Marvin said it best. "Life, don't talk to me about life.".
--
CKRone
ku.gro.nesnub [at] enorkc Ooh look, reverse me.
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| Re: [I] Boring, nothing to see [message #16462 ] |
Sa, 02 April 2005 16:14 |
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In article <963t411bj34iln3sasfo135860e6cjd21j [at] 4ax.com>, seeker_2001
[at] yahoo.com says...
> Ross said:
>=20
> >On Wed, 30 Mar 2005 20:00:13 +0100, CKRone wrote in
> ><amtl41l39estnf91ob3dlq2uabljfs74of [at] 4ax.com>, seen in
> >alt.fan.pratchett:
> >
> >Stevie D has said some good things, which I hopefully won't repeat,
> >and others have suggested counselling; from personal experience I will
> >tell you that counselling either works or it doesn't work at all, and
> >only you can know whether it is any use to you.=20
>=20
> The difficulty of course is getting the confidence to actually visit a
> counsellor at all, and then being able to say anything to them once you
> are there...
If you have the confidence to post to AFP, and thence to the entire=20
world, you should have the confidence to se a counsellor. Remember the=20
counsellor is trained to handle people with *exactly* your sort of=20
problem (amongst others) and is 100% on your side. The whole point and=20
training of a counsellor (at least as my wife is just completing her=20
training) is to be totally accepting and uncritical. A counsellor is=20
*not* there to tell you what to do, or to criticize you in any way, but=20
to enable you to understand better, and hence sort out, your problems.=20
And a counsellor should have no trouble in allowing you to express your=20
problems in your own style and in your own time.
Make sure that you go to a trained counsellor - unfortunately, there are=20
not yet any restrictions on anybody who wants to calling themselves a=20
counsellor. And don't assume that all counsellors are identical -=20
sometimes you don't "click" with a counsellor. If it isn't working after=20
three or four sessions, try another.
But give counselling a try.
> >
> >[...]
> >> I hate my job, been in it now for 3 1/2 years, first job since
> >> graduating, and am so peed off with it. There is no enjoyment at all,
> >> no fulfillment, nothing [1]. Oh, and a low wage.
> >
> >Yup, know the feeling. I'm fortunate enough that I managed a move
> >within my organisation to a job I thought I didn't want and would hate
> >(but the other option was resigning and what could I do in the world?).
>=20
> There are internal vacancies at mine which look okay, but when I check
> the requirements I don't meet some of them, so I just don't go further.
> Same with any other job I look into.
>=20
> >- and when I actually got the job discovered that it was the square
> >hole I'd been looking for rather than the round hole I'd been trying
> >to fit into before.
>=20
> That would be a nice thing to find.
Ant that is precisely what a counsellor should help you with: to express=20
your personal needs and wants so that you can sort out what is actually=20
important to you from the things you thought were important because=20
everybody else told you they were.
> >[...]+++
> >> I know, I'm pathetic aren't I.
> >
> >No, just suffering from the stress of a crap job. We all do that.
>=20
> What is stress? There isn't a single question, and anyone who sees me,
> myself included, can't see it, although you are probably close to
> corret.
Stress can be many different things. Fear, poverty, overwork are amongst=20
many causes. But a feeling that the overwhelming majority of your time=20
is spent doing things you don't want to do is a major source of stress.=20
And it has been shown many times that this can cause damage to both=20
mental and physical health. From your description, you need to take=20
action quickly to solve your problems. And since the action is not=20
obvious to you, you need professional assistance: either or both of=20
counselling and antidepressants.
> >> the thought of quitting without any plans seems silly, even though I
> >> keep thinking of doing just that. I just never get round to actually
> >> handing my notice in, even when I have it in my pocket ready and
> >> waiting.
> >
> >Don't do it. Really. I've nearly done it myself; at one point my
> >mother cut the connection as I was phoning in to tell the company to
> >stick the job. She was right, although it took a long time to admit it
> >and I hated her for it at the time.
>=20
> This is the problem with that. You get all the answers you want to the
> question about quitting. "Yes, I did it and found another job with no
> problems", "No, employers will think you are a slacker/idiot/etc",
> "Maybe, but it can be easier to get a job if you have a job". For me,
> if I did quit tomorrow, I'd probably bugger off somewhere short term,
> say a month somewhere holiday-type.=20
Forget the "employers will think you are a slacker etc." Over three=20
years is a perfectly respectable time to stay on a job. What worries an=20
interviewer (which I have been) is a succession of jobs of average=20
duration less than a year. One short job doesn't matter much - people=20
can make mistakes. But a succession suggests either that you cannot make=20
up your mind or that you cannot get on with people. Bit to say "I left=20
after three years because the job was too boring" - well, it wouldn't=20
worry me, as an interviewer. The worrying one is the person who claims=20
to have had six insane or bullying managers in a row.
> Time to think doesn't always help, regardless of the cause, I noticed.
Sorry to sound repetitive, but a counsellor would very much intend to=20
focus that "time to think". The counsellor does *not* think for you, but=20
they should enable you to think better.=20
> Thank you. Travelling is something I do want to do. Not had any abroad
> holiday since I was 16, and when not at work here I tend to either do
> nothing at home (this last two weeks) or go visit my sister and new
> nephew (the reason for going on I suppose).
That is an input for a new job. You can get jobs that give you an insane=20
amount of travelling. Maybe try that for a year or two? See the world,=20
suffer from jet lag..
>=20
> [20p] Always look on the bright side of life.
>=20
> Doesn't work if both sides are the pits of hell and damnation though,
> and all you can see is the dead parrot.
Absolutely classic depressive statement (as made by me, a few years=20
ago). IT CAN BE FIXED. Anti-depressants do work. Counselling does work.=20
I don't know which you need, or both. But see a professional, on one or=20
both fields, ASAP.
And, incidentally, getting off your backside to do so is often the first=20
step out of the pit.
--=20
[at] lec =A9awley
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